LIFE OF KRUSTY / Oct. 2007


Another PTSD Tuesday, it is Tuesday isn’t it? Ah what does it matter anyway? I have a doctor’s appointment today. Why they put their hands in the freezer first, I do not know. But I was dreading this examination. There has to be a more dignified way to have a colon cancer examination though. Maybe I should bring flowers or something, at least a kiss eh, are chocolates to much?

Been a bit crusty these days, holay, seems the world has gotten even more stupid. It’s like the world is being run by the Keystone Cops but with nuclear weapons. How far beyond stupid are we anyway? Well here I was getting all pissed off again and it won’t do a bit of good except give me gas. With a rectal exam on the agenda I don’t think the good doctor would have been amused with my flatulence. Yea, I’ll write about anything, get over it.

The last few weeks have been kind of hard for me since cirrhoses has been taking its toll on my village it seems. My brother was hanging in there, struggling with Ascities but was alive and bitching, thankfully and it was a close one eh. My poor auntie fell pray to diabetes and crossed and my niece contracted HIV then turned into AIDS and a nephew died from an overdose of Meth. Then my heart sank when I remembered my sister Pamela and how we struggled to save her life only to return her to the conditions that got her sick in the first place. It would have been an exercise in futility if it were not for the fact she was my sis. I would have died in her place if I could. To top it all off her and I had words over her pinhead boyfriend and we have not spoken since. With an important meeting on the agenda my mind should have been on TV and video. It was not like I did not have anything else to think about. But I was haunted by thought.

I drove down a tree lined lane enjoying the contrast against the deep blue Colorado sky and the Rocky Mountains. Robust with streaks of gold and amber the leaves shimmered in the sunlight. Snow caped peaks added to this picturesque celebration of autumn. It was such a beautiful scene to behold so I made a few prayers. As I prayed, I saw four hawks, the eagles little brother. They were on patrol and hunting victuals. Antelope were everywhere it seems as I drove on towards the interstate. It was a perfect time to talk to the Creator fore it was as if he was waiting for me to call. And it did my heart good to speak with Creator fore I was so alone with my thought. Solutions were equally isolated.

The interstate was writhe with traffic. The corpuscles of commerce surged through the veins of destiny. I found my place in this endless line of cars and trucks. Then I set my cruise and felt reflective as I popped a CD in the deck, “Whisper” a wonderfully performed string piece by violinist Gloria Mulhall from Dublin Ireland. This hauntingly beautiful score soothed my spirit and calmed my soul.

As I made my way to the doctor’s office I enjoyed the beauty I always seemed to take for granted. The pettiness of life’s journey was no longer an issue for me since it truly was of no concern at this juncture. It was a moment of absolute faith as I felt the Creators hand lift the sorrow from my tattered and bruised soul.

Then my cell phone burst into play as it broke my moment of solace and re-gathering. I was dreading answering it though. I knew that someone was going to piss me off or something lame like that. When I picked up the phone I heard this mono toned “Daria” sounding voice on the other end, “Do you know who this is?”

Immediately, tears began to flow down my Krusty face for it was my sister. I had to pull the car over since it simply overwhelmed me. Almost from the time I told her I recognized her voice we both began to apologize to one another. Then she said, “Let me finish” then I stopped my rambling since I was so excited to hear form her. She told me that all of what I told her in the first place was correct, even the part where he was going to get physically abusive. Guess he punched her out like I saw in my dream. But my puny little sister bought some time and waited till the right moment then she clocked him big time. She said he did not want anymore of it since she labeled him real good and he ended up on the floor. Then he begged her not to tell me, “Don’t tell Carlos please, he will kill me”, awwwwwwwwww how special. In an instant, I guess she could feel my rage because she also said, “I got him good so don’t do anything besides we are broke up now and he is OUT OF HERE”.

Course the ole Wiseguy within was egging me on since nobody hurts my family. I would go to prison with a smile on my face for making bones for my kin. But I was so happy to hear from my sis, it over rode my anger and with my PTSD’s I can go from zero to the speed of light. It would not be the first time I flew cross country to make a surprise visit fore it’s a matter of honor to me. Well my sister knows me very well since we both did the foster care thing as lived on the streets as kids when we ran away. But we talked most of the day and that did my spirit good to know she was still eating well and doing everything I taught her about nutrition. She made sure to keep me from taking a flight to Virginia since I know she could hear the gears in my mind working as we talked. All I was going to do was let this hero have the opportunity to smack me around. Gawd, it makes me pissed to envision anyone hitting my puny sister. She is very petite, dark skinned, graceful and drop dead gorgeous. How dare some 6’ 2” schmuck smack her around though. If he likes to gump, well this street kid can gump with the rest of them. Yeah Yeah Yeah, some things I still struggle with eh. I have some anger management issues I do believe. Well, no one is perfect.

In any event, I have a couple bonehead producers to talk to today. And possibly strike up a deal on some TV shows or painting the lines in the parking lot, no telling these days. It’s a free meal anyway so I better take my Tupperware and Wal-Mart bags.

Bada Bing, Bada Bang, Bada Boom.

Creativity is the byproduct of a fertile mind

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