Native Indian Humor

A word From The wise Dec 14, ’08 2:10 PM
by Ann for everyone
something I found on the internet…..
 
A word From The wiseRecently someone was browsing through the 40th Anniversary Issue of Reader’s Digest (dated Feb.1962), came across this reprint from the Washington News, and found it quite interesting in light of our current debates. The quote reads: Vice President Lyndon Johnson received the following message from a Native American Indian Chief on a reservation: “Be careful with your immigration laws. WE were careless with ours.”

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Blog Entry Back on the Rez Dec 13, ’08 9:18 PM
by Ann for everyone

 

Back on the Rez
 
Sandy Lake Superstition(A collaborative effort documenting some popular beliefs within our community)

1. If a toddler looks behind his/herself between his/her legs, that toddler is looking for their younger sibling meaning a baby is on the way!

2. If a female child uses a slingshot, her bosom will stretch and droop.

3. If you wear your shoes the wrong way, you will meet up with a bear.

Alternatively you could meet up with David Day (who will pinch your cheek).

4. While on a boat on Finger Lake, you cannot point your finger to the rock outcrop, otherwise you will get caught on the lake on your way back home while the wind picks up drastically and big waves
(white caps) form. Hence the reason many native people prefer to point with their lips!

5. A child crying in the night will attract a Geengongay (wolverine) which will take that child away.

6. If you kill a spider, it will start raining. If you kill a frog, It will rain and you will get a Chee-chee-gum.

7. If you hear a crow or raven at night, it is a bad omen.

8. If you hear a dog crying, it has to be put down, otherwise someone will die.

9. If you have a bad dream about someone, you must tell someone about it, otherwise it will come true.

10. If your eye twitches: Upper – Good Sign, Lower – Bad Omen.

11. If a Whiskeyjack (bird) makes an odd sound (?Weeyass?), it means you will kill a moose.

12. If a bird crashes into your window, its a bad sign (more so for the bird).

13. If there is a ring around the sun/moon: overcast and rain or snow is coming.

14. If you cut up a moose and the hind leg socket pops, that means another moose soon?.

15. If you see a bear with three cubs, thats a bad sign.

16. If you dream of killing a moose, its a good sign

17. If a fish sticks its head out of the water, its a bad sign.

18. Where theres lightning, cover your mirrors, otherwise lightning could strike them.

19. If you stare at the moon for too long, it will pull you to it.

20. As a child, if you wear a pot or bowl as a hat, it will stunt your growth.

21. If a female goes on a swing, she will start menstruating.

22. The deeper the groove at the back of your neck, the stingier you are.

23. If your fingernails are white at the base (gih-min-da-weh), it means that you dont like it that you dont get enough of whatever it is you are given.

24. If a bird flies into your house, it is a bad omen.

25. Northern Lights (Aurora Borealis) indicate strong winds the next day.

26. At a family dinner, no one eats until after grace is said then afterwards, if someone passes gas, that person must leave for the rest of the dinner.

27. If you look into your wallet and it is empty, its a bad sign

(alright this one belongs in the Joke-Sah-Weh section).

Lakota food, A BLT Dec 14, ’08 2:02 PM
by Ann for everyone
 Warning!!!!!! Not one for dog lovers!!!!!!!
 
“BLT in an American Indian Cuisine.”There was a young man traveling through South Dakota when he decided to veer of the major highway and go for a slower drive through country highways. He noticed the town of Wounded Knee on his map. The name triggered a memory from his high school days long ago. He turned west at 44 and headed for Wanblee.

The young man carefully navigated his way along the pock-marked road until reaching Wounded Knee. The road split at the bas of a small hill. A large green sign with white lettering told of the Wounded Knee Massacre of 1890. Surrounding the sign were several craft booths and a shinning new building, called, “Wolf Paw’s Dinner – Now Open.”

The young man was hungry and head into the dinner for something to eat. He entered the building, and the man behind the counter called, “Hello, I am Harold Wolf Paw, how can I help you?”

The young man looked over the menu of Buffalo stew, Tanega (buffalo stomach), Wojapi (fruit compote) in blueberry, chokecherry or blackberry, fry bread, and the one thing he recognized, a BLT.

“I’ll have the BLT with mayo please.” Harold Wolf Paw, disappeared into the kitchen to get his order.

The young man waited patiently for this Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato sandwich. He was happy to find something on the menu that he knew.

After a few minutes in the kitchen, Harold smiled and said, “Here you go, sir,” placing the sandwich the young man ordered in front of him. The young man looked over his sandwich, red tomato and green lettuce surrounded by what appeared to be roast beef.

“Ah, excuse me Harold, but I ordered a BLT not a roast beef sandwich,” to which Harold responded, “Well, that IS a BLT. We do not serve roast beef here.”

To which the young man replied, “But this is NOT a BLT.”

“Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato sandwich?” Harold exclaimed, “Of course not. You are in Lakota country, and we serve Lakota food. A BLT here is Black Lab on Toast!”

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