HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men’s
used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with several
empty beer cans,a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine
and several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
“Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for
more ammo. Back in an hour. Don’t mess with the pit bulls —
they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real
bad. I don’t think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from
all the blood.
PS – I locked all four of ’em in the house. Better wait outside.”